People! It’s already December 4… see time does fly… why does it always fly lately… getting fast and faster. It seems trying to keep up with me… however, time did not beat me up on November as I was fully aware on November and I can recall what have happened on November. It was 30 days full of “thinking days”. Think… think… and think… I need to decide about something and I have decided… but I have to admit that many times I stumble down on my own decision. There were too many negotiable things or things that I try to negotiate.
In November, I also decided to keep my joy… the difficult job for me while for many people maybe it’s just a small (or silly) thing… but I have been trying and I know I will keep trying to keep it in my mind. Why do I make my life harden by being so melancholic, too emotional which actually is so “me”
In November also I learn to become wiser as a woman. Understand that many things in world could not work out as planned, could not work out as what I thought. Many things…
I have learnt long ago that nothing more in this world could surprise me. I mean anything related me and the small world around me. My small world could be my co-workers, peers, friends, good friends, truly matter people, anyone and anything related to me. But in November I know, that still many things in my life lately that surprise me and make me wonder… how come it happened to me? how come I stumble again on the same stone? how come I could be so naïve to believe something that normally unbelievable? Many things have surprised me… For some people it is good to always expect surprise. But hey, surprise is not always about a good & great thing. Sometimes surprise comes when you are not ready to get it.
However, I have learnt very good things in November.
I have learnt to deal with my own heart… I learnt not to fight against it anymore… I learnt to be more calm, “be still my soul”… I learnt to take my life one day at a time… I learnt to take all friends of mine just as they are. I have learnt long ago (actually) that people has different way of think, so never see them with our own glasses.
Just go with all those things and keep your joy. Be happy. Learning to smile on my problem even laugh at it.
Just today I also learnt another thing, to control my perspective. Yeah, it’s all about perspective I think. How I see things from the perspective.
This morning I wake up with bit blue feeling. Actually not only this morning, but lately I always wake up with “sort of blue empty feeling”. I understand that feeling so well and I know why and when I have that feeling. Unlike the other days lately, that blue feeling last longer till afternoon. Then I did something that makes it even worse. Oh boy… but, because I have learned not to fight against my feeling, so I try to deal with it. Thinking how can I do to make it better.
Why do the sweet memories turn to be sad things when the person with whom I share the sweet memories is no longer beside me? Why the nice things could feel bitter when it’s past already and things did not work out as planned? Shouldn’t the nice things be still nice things? No matter how good or bad things followed after? Then why don’t I enjoy the nice things, enjoy it as it was and it is. As the nice things should be still nice things… What the things are happening now and tomorrow have nothing to do with the sweet memories.
“It is merely how you control your perspective. It is your perspective on the wrong place that unable you to feel the happiness to keep your joy!”
So, trying to control your perspective now…
I know, it’s not a very easy things to do… but I want to learn changing my perspective.
I’ve been through some rough times in my life, made a few mistakes, and slipped up more than I care to admit. However, hey, many people been thru the same situation I believe. I am not the only one in this planet. I see many friends of mine have similar problem but it’s so interesting to see how they handle it with many different ways that in harmony with their own. It’s all about the perspective…
I am glad it’s already Friday…December 5. It took me almost 24 hours to write and finish this blog. I think Friday is coming to fast… again, it is trying to keep up with me. This morning I saw my life for the next 3 days thru blue glasses, but thank God now I have changed my glasses (my perspective) and I see my life thru the green glasses, my favorite color, then amazingly I feel happy and know for sure, this long week end is gonna be great for Adelina…
Thanks God…
